Monday, October 31, 2011

A Father's Duty

They say being a parent or a father doesn't come with an instruction manual. That is true. But you can observe the fathers you have seen growing up and learn who does what best with their children, your friends.

I don't claim to be the world's best dad. You would have to ask my 3 kids about that. Here is a letter from my daughter, maybe I haven't done too bad.  A Father's Day Letter Repost

But I do know what a father is supposed to do. You don't put your children in harms way. You don't ridicule them, demeanor them, belittle them.  You don't try to make them a carbon copy of you. You don't abandon them because raising children is hard. You try to guide them, a nudge here and there.

You can't say I am like that because that is how I was raised. It stops now. You make the changes.

Verbal abuse

Physical abuse

Sexual abuse

It all sucks. And some children suffer from it all.

Unfortunately you can't be unfathered.  But you probably shouldn't have been one to begin with.

For many of you, you have scarred your children forever. Eating disorders, depression, nervous breakdowns.

And the sad thing is they tried to please you. They lived in fear growing up around you. You didn't care.

And your legacy. You left behind some wonderful children who grew up thinking it was all their fault.

But we know better don't we.

As a dad, you were a piece of shit.

That should be on your tombstone.


P.S.

To the fathers who are doing the best you can, thank you. This wasn't about you anyway.

2 comments:

Fanypap said...

Ray I was sure that you are a very good, tender and honour father! Enjoy your good children!I wish all of you be happy! Kisses from Greece.

raydenzel1 said...

Fany

It was something I had to say. Some of it is personal, some of it involves people I have met and some who I will never meet. Everyone has a story and I wanted it to be known that I have listened.

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